Thanks Starbucks. I Basic(ally) Wish You Just Wouldn’t.

In celebration of the 20th Anniversary of Frappuccino, starting June 8th, Starbucks is offering six new flavors: Caramel Cocoa Cluster, Cinnamon Roll, Cotton Candy, Cupcake, Lemon Bar, and Red Velvet Cake.

Yay!!! right?

Ummm, no.

Not if you care AT ALL about what you are putting into your body… or into your children’s bodies.

Hang on… hang on… stop rolling your eyes and hear me out. This is going somewhere. 

If you’ve read my blogs before, you may remember my rants on “mom guilt” and the fact that it is a real, live thing. Maybe it’s just the way I was raised, but I NEVER drank coffee as a child, nor have I (until the last month) indulged in my adulthood. I mean, there’s that whole stained teeth and coffee breath thing… Ack! No thanks! Well, in reference to the mom guilt, my daughters love Starbucks. LOVE it, y’all. L.O.V.E.I.T. At first, I fought this. I turned my nose up at the thought of MY children drinking (GASP!) coffee. I even secretly gave the stink eye to all of the friends’ parents who purchased these evil concoctions for my angel daughters. I was that mom. You know the one… the “MY kids will NEVER do that” mom. Well… they did. And they still do. I have even I mean, Santa has even put Starbucks cards in my girls’ stockings! What the what?! I know, right?

My original intention of keeping these drinks out of the hands of my children was because of obvious lack of nutritional value. Children don’t need coffee. Period. We all know that. So that was enough for me to stand by my “No.” when asked. Now, however, I have taken a moment to research what exactly IS in that drink and it is shocking. It’s one thing for me to provide you with this:


But it is quite another for me to put it to you like this: The Cinnamon Roll frappuccino, for example, contains an insane 102 grams of sugar! That’s roughly the equivalent of drinking an entire one-liter bottle of Coca Cola, or scarfing down about thirty sugar cubes all at once. To be medically precise, it’s four times the recommended daily allowance of sugar for a human being.


There THAT is.

Last I checked, MOST of us, especially the ones with young children, frown upon our kids having A soda, one, singular.

I am not innocent though. Recently, having my love of anything smores in her back pocket, my teenager casually points out an adult human-size sign in front of Starbucks at Target. Smores and Caramel Ribbon Crunch are the new flavors and dang it… she’s convinced me. Back to that mom guilt – I really just wanted to treat her by answering with a surprising “Sure, why not?” instead of my usual “Umm, no.” So, we order. I let her know that I am only buying these for us because I love smores and that this will not be a regular thing and don’t tell your sister and don’t ask again and so on and so on.


Well, I loved that stupid Frappuccino. I don’t even like whipped cream, which adds about 200 calories, btw… and I slurped that bad boy down to nothing! I’m ashamed to admit the number of these I have had since that day, and it’s been less than one month. #sipface #starbucksaddict over here.

So, what do I do? Oh, just tell them no, you say? It’s really that easy? Yes… I guess it’s going to have to be. It’s gotten to the point that every.single.time. we pass a Starbucks, someone in the car pipes up and wants to stop… including myself. And nowwwwww… there’s all these new and delicious flavors tempting me my daughters!

I’ve got to put a stop to this madness.


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